Chocolate Fever Across The Street

I was stunned.

I go to my dog house upstairs in the back room of my house to watch television.

I notice that my neighbor across the street - my buddy - has a truck parked on the street in front of his house. I wondered if he was having a cookout over the weekend and why didn't we get an invite. We actually were supposed to be heading out of town but we canceled at the last minute and decided to just chill at home. I thought that he assumed that we were not home and thus didn't call.

As I watch my television and browsed the web - I look out side and got the shock of my life!!

My "Black Flight Progressive" friend and neighbor's daughter is kissing on a White boy wearing a skull cap.

I wish I had my camera on me but then I figured that I should not violate their privacy as such.

Let me be clear - I am not hating. I am not mad. I can think of several interracial relationships among friends and family. I don't have a problem with it as one might believe. I learned after one attempt that it was just not for me. Too many stares from strangers as I walked through Underground Atlanta. (Well in that one case - stares to see if she was White or Black. She was actually mixed. Likely an octoroon. Raised by her White relatives and seeking to get in touch with her Black side. Now that I think of it - I believe I met her at the Black history museum in Atlanta - Apex. This was about 16 years ago.).

Then there was the time I had a lunch meeting with a sales executive who was a White female.  Though I knew full well we were just talking business, the elderly White man who snarled at me from a few tables away figured that we were breaking a taboo and he let me know it as he shook his head.  For me the though of having so much pressure from outside of the relationship among two people because of the "exception" was a bit more than I was willing to deal with.  There is already enough to deal with internally without such a constant force of scrutiny. 

I was actually shocked to see what I saw across the street though.

Living In A Conservative Republican Controlled County In The South

I will be honest. I have been living in this now mixed - formerly majority White subdivision/community for about13 years. I have always looked at this area as a grand "experiment on race relationships". Though the school bus stop of 13 years ago that was all White has not turned to 90% Black - the community in general remains highly diverse. The county has retained its conservative character.

I am not going to lie - I figured that the main threat that would destroy the teppid arragement was the sight of an increasing number of young Black males dating White girls and thus destroying the vision of what their parent's grandchildren would look like. Of course there is a heightened amount of sensitivity in regards to the dating choice of the women of any race.

I won't lie again. My general mode of operation has been to "stick with my own kind". I would play it cool with a White women unless she made it clear to me that she was interested. (What am I talking about? This was my policy with Black women too. As my wife later told me - "Love the one who loves you first" is the best policy. After recently seeing the long term results of at least 2 females that I initiated interest in several years ago - maybe I was better off reacting to women who first showed an interest in me. But I disgress).

I honestly did not factor for the occasion where a White male would date a Black girl in this - conservative, Republican dominated county and city. The stereotype is that the Black male typically goes after the White girl and thus the old "You stay away from my daughter" confrontation happens later.

I now need to tacitly probe my buddy to get his own views on the situation happening under his nose. He will tell me if he is 100% cool with it or if he sees this as a passing phase for his daugther.

We have talked before about what we would do if a disresptful male came courting our daughters. For example - pulling up in our driveway and honking his horn for our daughter to come out of the house. Both of us agreed that we would tell our daughter to stay in the house until this rude MoFo came up to the house and rang the bell. Paying proper respect to the man of the house. It was a foregone conclusion that the sutor was a Black kid.

In my last bit of honesty. I would prefer my children to date a Black person of the opposite gender. This would be the least challenging relationship on average. Once again - I can think of several White male/Black female relationships among friends. I am cool with the male and we get along just fine. I ultimately yield to the fact that these two people will have to get along with each other in their relationship and there is little that I could do about their decision. As long as this person fit into our family culture and was not a sorespot for other reasons (abuse, alcohol, chronic job loss, etc) I am accepting.

I think that I would have a greater problem if a straight up thug with no respect were to come to my house and, heaven forbid I had to make my daughter choose between him or me/the family.

I just hope that my beloved daughter won't drag her father's heart down the street like this. She has too much sense at this point to do such a thing.

Believe me - I am going to be a hater upon the first male to set foot into MY HOUSE.